mindset consultant

PROFESSIONAL LIFE 101 | 6 tips to create an amazing collaboration

Have you ever tried to organize a party, a dinner and people rsvp'd last minute or even not at all ? You pour your heart and soul into the planning but can’t organize it because you don’t know how many people are coming? This is just one of the many examples of massive frustration. But we have a solution for you.

 
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First of all I want to thanks those fantastic people who have worked with us and helped to achieve amazing partnerships. Thank you guys for your hard work and professionalism, You ROCK.

Sadly, this professionalism is actually quite hard to find. And it stops you from A: creating that awesome project you have in mind and B: having a solid team of people to do it.

Let's review the most common issues:

  • People disappear from the face of the Earth (while updating their instagram feed)

  • People reschedule all the time. (while sharing that awesome cat video on facebook)

  • People cancel last minute. Like when you're already there. (With a snap like "HANGING OUT WITH BAE LOL")

Conclusion: everything ends up sucking. Hard core.

I feel like some people don’t understand the challenge behind a “simple collaboration”. They don’t take it seriously or maybe they don’t even care and don't get me started on the unpaid side of things we deal with sometimes.

Whether you are one of these people or not, we have put together a list of advice you can apply to your daily life, here, take it, it's free and you will make friends.

HERE ARE 6 TIPS TO CREATE AWESOME COLLABORATIONS :

• it all started with... a great communication

Let's face it, being honest all day everyday is not in the human nature and can even be hurtful if you don’t use the good words. 

Don't worry though, for professional collaborations, it is actually not that hard. If you want your project to work, you need to know not only your expectations but also your team's. Honesty and communication from the very beginning will build the game plan. And if you have a solid game plan, you are very likely to get outstanding results.

Pro tip: Since we don’t know intimately the people we are gonna work with, it gives us a chance to stay objective and put our ego aside, yay!

• Don’t be afraid to say “NO” if you can’t do a project.

Apparently in this case, your team members gets a higher chance to get abducted by aliens before (or even in the middle sometimes) of the project you're working on. Joke aside, it's okay to be busy. If you already know you can't make it, just say no. Promise no one will hate you, we might actually respect you more and thus we will still share cookies with you.

 
When we work on a collaboration.

When we work on a collaboration.

 

• AN EXCELLENT ORGANIZATION is a must

If communication is the pillar in a project, organization is the white picket fence around it. The two basic skills are the following:

 1) Plan your trip in advance: Check how long it takes to go to the location, find if there are constructions on subway lines or roads, leave earlier than what GOOGLE or the GPS says. If you drive, be careful with rush hour time.

2) Come ready: Write a list (I have never been a big fan of lists but I found them very helpful, especially when I have a lot on my mind) and make sure you have everything you need before leaving.

• BE PROFESSIONAL (DUH). Even when no money is involved.

I care a lot about this point. I was telling you earlier that it’s hard to find people acting professionnal for unpaid projects. As photographers, we have worked for free a lot and we still do sometimes.  People have the feeling that if they don’t make money for their services when they do a project, there is no need to put effort on it. Wrong !!! If you chose to get on board for a collab for whatever reason, honor it. "Not Paid" doesn’t mean "Not Serious".

• BE INVOLVED. It's more fun and we ain't your mama.

Just because you didn’t start this collaboration doesn't mean you can’t be fully into it. Bring your ideas with you, new suggestions are always welcome.

Another good way to have fun in a project which is not yours, is to take initiatives. Talk to people, create contacts, ask if you can help with anything. When it’s your turn, don’t hesitate to give direction, you know what you have to do, you know your craft.

• LAST MINUTE CANCELLATION will result in a bloody nose.

Ahhh the famous last minute cancellation, a tricky subject! Life is full of surprises and sometimes, we have to deal with a change of plans. If for whatever reason you can'tmake it anymore (and it is actually a legit reason, not a "I didn't wake up this morning y'all"), don't forget other people are counting on you (looking straight at that hairstylist that didn't show up for our latest styled shoot.)

Here is what to do: either contact the project planner to advise him/her on your cancellation as soon as you know. It helps to deal with the damage control that follows.

Second, if unfortunately you have no other alternative than not showing up the day of the project, be a grown-up and find someone to replace you.

Now, you should be ready to fly from the nest, keep your pretty nose, and make new friends to create some new awesome projects. You're welcome.

 
 

are YOU coming to The Scandaleuse Soirée?

We are launching our first soirée ever on November 13th for a new service we are launching. Come party with us!

What "self-care" really is.

For the past couple of years or so, “self-care” has been popping up everywhere you look, at all times. It's around so much that it's become some sort of trend and we don't even know what it actually means anymore because everyone has different definitions. Since we are big advocates of what we call “true” self-care, this is our contribution.

 
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If we really think about it, we have "care" in "self-care".
Let's have a look at its standard definition:

"The provision of what is necessary for the health, welfare, maintenance, and protection of someone or something."

Meaning that self-care is You providing You the tools you need to function in a healthy, safe and grounded way. Physically, mentally, it pretty much applies to anything you deal with in your life.

Are we all good so far? Good.

Treating yourself is different than caring for yourself

Oh boy is it easy to mix them up. The biggest difference is as follows:

Treating yourself relies on instinct.

It is usually a quick & easy fix to feel good in a very specific moment and it fades fairly fast. Moreover, treating yourself is not always good for you. Like indulging into drinking that whole bottle of wine to yourself or eating that enormous bag of cheetos watching Gilmore Girls. Feels good in the moment, but afterwards, not so much.

Self-care requires more work but comes with long-term effects. You are simply setting yourself up for a better version of You. 

And to tell you the truth, self-care doesn't always feel good at first. It's like going to the gym for someone that never worked out before. At first, you hate it. It challenges you, makes you feel sore and out of your comfort zone. But stick to it for a while and only then you will get the benefits that leads to actual self-care. 

Self-care takes time because you need a while to build a habit that will result in a positive outcome for You. Again "care" = protected, maintained and healthy. And that doesn't come easy in a world where we are constantly stimulated and influenced in a zillion directions.

So to make it simple: treating yourself is a punctual feel-good relief VS self-care is a long-term process to set yourself up for a better You

 
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The other thing that we have also noticed is that the words "self-care" have been thrown around so much in ads, online & prints, that it has now been used as an excuse. You don't feel like doing something? Slap the "self-care'' label on it and don't do it. We are all guilty of that. If you don't want to stick to your work-out routine, fine, but what about when other people are involved? 

inconsideration is not too far from nowadays' "self-care" definition.

Let's say you are planning a party for weeks. You're taking care of everything and invited a bunch of your friends you really want to spend time with, who RSVP-ed. I bet you that at least 2 people will not show up last minute because "they don't feel it anymore" or worse "something else came up" (= something else that it turns out they would rather do, we are obviously not talking about an emergency situation here.). Some may not even tell you and just not show up. Lovely. 

Prioritizing yourself in one thing. And we know you need to do it for your own sanity and well-being. But from the moment it removes accountability or reliability, it is not self-care, it's just you being a dick.

And guess what? You do need a good circle of real friends and family to grow, be inspired, to evolve in general.

Nurturing relationships and being respectful to others is part of self-care too. It is another way to set yourself up for a better future because you will be surrounded by love. Wow the virtuous cycle. 

Everyone's purpose is to feel in harmony with ourselves and self-care is the ultimate way to make it there. Is it an easy path? Nope. Is it worth it? Undoubtedly yes. For you because you will accomplish your dream goals, but also for others, because once you really get in touch with yourself, you also help your surroundings get there too. And that's how the world changes for the best. Now take care.

Speaking of self-care, we have a the perfect opportunity for you.

come join us for our first Soirée in Toronto on November 13th at Pray Tell!

You are who you surround yourself with

Wilferd Arlan Peterson once said: “Walk with the dreamers, the believers, the courageous, the cheerful, the planners, the doers, the successful people with their heads in the clouds and their feet on the ground. Let their spirit ignite a fire within you to leave this world better than when you found it.

 
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Energies are contagious

Relationships are precious as belonging and feeling loved is one of the most important need for humans. We make room in our big hearts to welcome new people while we are still keeping old friends in, we give time to so many different personalities than sometimes on the road, we start feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. Everyday we cross path with so many diverse people without realizing their energies affect us in different ways, wether they are positive or negative.

Did it ever happen to you that you were full of joy until someone with a negative vibe enter the room and steal that happiness away from you? Yet that person did not physically took it from you with her/his bare hand but it feels like it! Energies are contagious, so it can be really tiring for the mind to deal with negative ones.

Letting go of a relationship

They said who we surround ourselves with, we become… And they are right. Our life is too important to through away the opportunity of becoming who we want to be and having the life we deserve because we are making the mistake of spending time with people who don't share the same values or don't bring anything positive in our life. Fortunately we can take the decision to sort out our relationships, choose who we want to spend quality time with!

Last year we went to a workshop about femininity and the speaker said something I will always remember, she made us do an exercise that changed my all relationship: “Close your eyes, look at your life, think of all of the things you have accomplished and scanned them out. How do they make you feel?” I thought about Scandaleuse, my life in Canada, my family, my friends and my relationship with my partner at that time. All of them felt fantastic except for the last one. I felt sad, stressed, had knots in my stomach… it was at that moment I took the decision to stop that long term relationship I was in. He wasn't a bad guy and I was really in love but something wasn’t working anymore and love wasn't enough to fix it. So I had to take the hardest decision of my life and I don’t regret it.

 
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You need to know yourself first!

  • Visualize the life you want and find people who share the same values.

  • Listen to your guts and feel how people around you make you feel.

  • You feel something is wrong, identify the cause.

  • Talk to the person about how you feel.

  • Look for a solution but don't hesitate to check out if you feel like it.

It is such a difficult step but 100% needed if you feel that relationship is bringing you down, whether it comes from a good friend, a lover or a family member. When it comes to your feelings and happiness, you have the right to be selfish. It does not matter if the person is nice or depressed, if you are in love or staying because it is convenient, you cannot let the fear or guilt dictate your needs. It is time to think about how you want to feel!