Boredom is a state of mind

We are in a stage of the quarantine that is getting harder and harder on people's spirit. I see that through social media and the conversations I have with friends and family: it is pretty easy to feel trapped and see our home as a cage. Most of us are bored and staying home is getting on our nerves.

Can you guess what happens when we feel this way?

We leash out, get easily angry (and hungry but that is another story!) and are in search for drama. We look for people to put the blame on and we let our frustration and anger control our behaviour. We focus on how the situation is affecting us and forget that we all are in this together. This is how most of the little “online wars” are created, sometimes with the worst intention, sometimes just to make people laugh:

• Pressure is put on people when saying we have to take this quarantine as an opportunity to learn something new.

• Jokes on getting fat from staying home are created without thinking it can hurt people who might be in this situation.

• Critics are done on women who decide to show their body on social media, because this is their way to feel better about themselves (actually, my bad, this happens all the time!).

We are in a fragile and unstable time, we can easily go from fighting this all together as a community, to becoming selfish and creating a civil war.

So what if, instead of letting our emotions control our actions, we focus on passing time in an healthier way?

But I'm so bored!

Hey pssst, come closer, we have a secret to share…

Boredom is a state of mind.

It is difficult to believe there is nothing for us to learn, create or share. Let's be honest here, most of us can easily find some suff to do! We are lucky to live in an era where technology is 100% part of our life, so unless you don't have access to internet, many activities are accessible online. If internet, for X reasons, isn't an option for you, there are still books you can read, creative activities you can start and games you can play (remember when we were kids and used to have fun with almost everything?).

By the way, sometimes it feels good to not do anything. If you just feel like sitting on a chair and contemplate life through your window with a cup of hot coffee or a glass of wine, then you should do it. Never blame yourself and feel guilty for doing something simple. As long as it makes you happy (and you are not hurting anyone) this is the most important!

The problem isn't related to inaccessible activities, it is just a lack of motivation!

Mindset, one more time, is the key.

If nothing around you motivates you, it's probably because there is something going on with your emotions: maybe you feel lonely, maybe you are frustrated or sad... It might be a good idea then to dig deeper and figure out why you feel the way you feel at that moment.

It is normal and totally ok to not feel awesome 100% of the time. Negative feelings are actually a way to realign with ourselves to get closer to the person we wanna be. They are here to tell us that something in our life isn't right for us and needs to be improved. But it is also important to not let those feelings completely absorb our light and positivity, neither to let them drag us down. This why it is essential to understand where they come from, so we can “fix” the problem and bring back happiness. The goal is simply to feel better.

We assure you that if you feel happy, you will find something YOU WANT TO DO!

Don't forget to have fun!

Movement is a great way to help being motivated… So we have one word for you: MUSIC. Yeah you got it right, put some tunes on and dance! Music is an universal language, everybody react to it. Even some animals have the ability to understand and move on the waves when certain types of melody are played. There is a great show on Netflix called “Explained”, one episode talks about that and it's super interesting!

Alright! Now that the motivation is back, here is a list of different activities you can do at home:

• Build a card castle or a fort… Or a fort made out of cards!

• Parkour! with your furniture (don't get too crazy there though, you don't wanna end up at the hospital).

• Try the OH NA NA NA challenge if you don't live alone.

• Redecorate your home.

• Practice handstands.

• Organize a short balcony party with your neighbours like those crazy Italian people (those guys are awesome!).

• Grow new veggies from veggies you bought at the supermarket.

• And of course the classics such as cooking, reading, learning, working out, meditate or watching everything Netflix has to offer.

You will always find something to do that makes you happy as long as you feel at peace with yourself.

Be patient, we will all go through this experience even stronger than we were before. But we have to stick together and be more mindful of others. If this situation is too hard on your mental, don't hesitate to talk and share how you feel with people who love you.

You are not alone!

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Covid 19 - Our opinion about all of that madness

Between freaking out a little, bringing new ideas to life and reorganizing ourselves, we haven't really had the time to give you our opinion about the madness happening in our world right now. It is a scary situation that is going to change our entire economy and not knowing what to expect and when it will get better is probably the hardest part of it…

But we believe it will be for the best.

When it all started

We are not gonna lie, when we realized we would not be able to offer boudoir shoots for a while, the idea of a potential quarantine was like a slap in the face. We were not stressed out because of the virus, neither the fear of loneliness but by the lack of income… It is crazy how money can make people jump from happiness to depression in a really short amount of time! We got sad, tired, cranky and filled with negative thoughts (I even had a panic attack on my balcony one night!).

It felt like all of those years building Scandaleuse Photography was gonna end up in the garbage, like this beautiful adventure was all for nothing. We understood then how Rick Grimes and his friends must have been feeling in their zombie apocalypse and how, like them, we will have to improve our survival skills in order to stay alive…

Yeah we agree, it's a bit too dramatic but this is how negativity can make you feel sometimes!

There is always sun above the clouds

We HAD to change our way of thinking, so we rented a car, packed our bags and went to nature for a couple of days to relax, strategize and refocus. This was what we needed, we even met a man who was very spiritual and who helped us to see things in a clearer way (he also cooked delicious breakfasts for us and we all know food is the perfect remedy against sadness).

When we came back to Toronto with a lighter mind and heart, it was easier to switch our mindset in a positive way: we brainstormed about new ideas for the business, how to make online income and reminded ourselves that we are young healthy people with a roof over our heads, so it could have been a lot worse!

Call us naive or utopian if you want, but we also decided to believe this situation is a actually a blessing in disguise.

Our world is changing

Humans are smart.

All of us are! We are a resourceful specie who can adapt to any situation and we are lucky to be living in a time where technology is a big part of our lifestyle. There is so much we can do if we decide to see outside of the box and open our mind to new ideas. It's a matter of taking action and surrounding yourself (well virtually for now) with people who impact your life in a positive way.

Look at how people are being creative and taking control of the situation! It did not take long to see the solidarity and faith we are building between businesses and communities: being forced to be appart is actually bringing us closer to each other.

If like us you care about our planet, you will agree when we say this situation is also having a positive impact on the environment (beside the single use products that are unfortunately coming back): pollution is decreasing, some animals are coming back where they belong… It's making us understand that we need to go back to a more natural and healthier way of living.

In a nutshell, it's teaching us what is essential in life and how to be happy with less than we think we need.

It is time to focus on you

Before everything happened, we always complained we didn’t have enough time because we were all busy working our butts off. Well, see this situation as the perfect opportunity to take time for yourself: you do not have excuses anymore to push back your projects and own growth.

Don't roll your eyes, we all find excuses, Juliette and I included :)

We have access to so many useful online ressources like books, classes, podcasts, movies… So it should be easy to finally learn that new language you always wanted to speak, write this book that have been at the back of your mind for so long or launch your online cooking classes you have been working on. Boredom is a negative feeling that can easily be transformed if you feel at peace with yourself.

Stop stopping yourself and give it a try (what do you have to lose anyway?)!

You are not alone

It is not because we are in quarantine that we have to be alone: get to know those people you have interest in. Simply send them a message and start a conversation. You might be surprised to see that you can still create friendships.

If social distancing is getting to hard to deal with and you start to feel lonely, then organize virtual drink dates with your friends, dance parties, books reading… whatever group activities that can make have some fun.

Remember that you are loved and have people around you who are here when you feel lonely, scared and stressed. You just have to reach out to them.

And to us! We are here for you as well.

The goal of this article is not to tell you what to do and how you should react. We all have different ways to deal with stressful situations and make ourselves feel better. We just want to bring some sunshine and hope and let you know that you will be ok: you are strong enough to adapt and change your lifestyle, so you can keep building that awesome life you deserve!

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Painful intimate conditions we should talk about more.

If I had the opportunity to read the following blog post when I was in my darkest time, it would have made me feel a lot less lonely. Maybe it would have allowed me to heal faster. So I hope this will help you.

Here goes: I have had UTIs and vaginal infections for as long as I can remember. Here is the fun part: everytime there is no bacteria, nothing "wrong" medically speaking to justify them. Stress-triggered apparently. 

I went through years of medical tests to find nothing. I wasn't even taken seriously half the time. There is nothing much online besides telling me to shove cranberries down my throat and eat probiotics. No guidance, no help. 

"Most women get those".

It is damn true: every single time I have mentioned it to a woman, she also shared her own intimate struggle with me too. It's like we all suffer in silence.

But just because most of us have to deal with annoying conditions like these doesn't mean it should be swept under the carpet and not spoken about.

Those conditions can make you spiral so bad and end up seriously affecting your everyday life. For years, that's all I could think about. Every time symptoms start to show up (as recently as last month), this vicious cycle of fear that I am screwed for the rest of my life and that it will never go away begins. 

Do I follow the basic " how to avoid-UTIs” starter pack? Please, if there was a competition for the best users, I'd probably win. No douching, pick the right underwear, drink tons of water, pee after sex, nothing too tight, all of those have been part of my daily routine forever.

So yeah, a few weeks ago after a few months of peace, right on my birthday, boom, it began again. I started with the medical consultation, got antibiotics I probably didn't need, and it made it worse.

During a late night internet search with hope to find some relief, I came across some comments from women such as "I have been dealing with these for 40 years". And it hit me: there is NO WAY in hell I will have to struggle for decades. 

Obviously, my intimate adventures are due to something going on beyond a physical level. It's a way for my body to handle stress or even share a message with me. Better start trying to find another approach. 

The quest of alternative solutions. 

A little disclaimer here: I know my body pretty well as I started having bacteria-free UTIs when I was 6 years old. Everything I share here is based on my own experience. Don't avoid medical attention in your case unless you are 100% sure of what you are doing.

Here is what I used to do:

• Panic google search any type of condition or remedies to try to put a label on it

• Not talk about it because I was ashamed of it and thought I could handle the spiralling alone. 

• Being angry at my body for f*cking up.

• Being scared of sex. More particularly pain during sex and fearing that I would disappoint my partner. So naturally, I left him out of what I was going through.

Here is what I tried this time, after breaking down:

• Noticing patterns: when did I feel the worse symptoms? I noticed they usually didn't show up when I was distracted or busy. Good point.

• Talked to my partner. Guess what, he understood. Of course he freaking did. 

• Freaking breathe. I made relaxation a priority a little bit more every day by stretching, meditating, working out, anything that simply felt right. 

But the most interesting thing I tried this time: I treated myself to a healing session with a Reiki practitioner.

Last year, I started reading more and more about alternative healing, the role of energies and the Universe. While I don't believe in everything I read, I kind of take whatever feels right to me. 

During the healing session, I asked Tiffany, the healer, to focus on this area of my body, to see if maybe she saw blocages or could get any guidance. And it got very interesting. A lot of useful information came out of this session, but I think the biggest one that clicked in my brain was when she talked about my balance between masculine and feminine energy.

Masculine VS Feminine energy

To explain it simply: each of us have both masculine and feminine energy. Just like the Yin and the Yang, they complete one another.

The masculine energy is more about "doing", being square and on a mission to accomplish things. The feminine energy is about "being", flowing through life, living your emotions. 

Backstory: I have always been a very controlling person. I am a planner, I am super rational and a goal achiever. To-do lists are my jam. I need structure to avoid stress, or so I thought.

What Tiffany saw during my session was that my feminine energy was tiny compared to my masculine energy which was acting like a bodyguard to protect me. Guess what is the center of the feminine energy in women? Pelvic area. Bladder, womb, vagina.

The conclusion was that since my masculine energy was off the chart, my feminine one had no choice but "firing up" down there to show its presence. By learning to let go and surrender, I could start healing myself.

Note that I was pretty much bawling my eyes out on that table, I had no doubt that this revelation was true.

The good news? Tapping into your feminine energy is super fun. It's all about not planning, indulging, going with the flow, moving around, being creative. I also tried Yin Yoga, which is supposed to help you reconnect with this specific energy and I couldn't believe the positive impact it's had on me. I also read this article that was pretty helpful (note the #7 of the list by the way eheh)

I started giving myself a break and forgiving me for thinking my body was doing something wrong.

When I start feeling pain, I take a moment to recenter, take a deep breath and let my feminine energy know that I hear her, she is safe, I am safe, and I am here for her. I tell myself that I am letting go, I relax my jaw (automatically, that's where I start tensing up). And it works. It just freaking works. Slowly, the symptoms disappear and I have spent my first few days in MONTHS symptoms free. 

Honestly, I am proud of myself for going out of my way to learn more about me. I'm getting close to my 30's and thought I knew myself 1000%. Turns out I didn't and I like what I am learning now. 

If you have been dealing with UTIs, yeast infections, intimate pains… know that you are not alone. Know that you can find relief. You may have to try different things before finding something that works. Follow your instinct for what YOU think is good for YOU. 

Looking to try the healing session I did? Reach out to Tiffany here!

Entrepreneur life - Don't fear a business slowdown

Being a business owner is a rewarding and freeing experience. You get to make your own schedule, bring your ideas to life, take all the decisions to make it successful. You see it grow over the years and it's all because of your hard work. But being a business owner is also tiring and overwhelming, as it takes a lot of courage, perseverance and thrive to not give up.

Your business is your child, it becomes part of you so it is very easy to start doubting yourself when something goes wrong. Most of the time those negative thoughts are related to the fear of lacking money. We all, as entrepreneurs, thought at least once:

“Oh my god, we will eat potatoes for the rest of our life because we lost that client. Our business is over!”

(Dramatic music. End of the scene. Curtain closed.)

Let's be realistic and less dramatic, it takes A LOT OF MISTAKES to have a business closing down but not having a regular and secure employee's income can make you pessimistic from time to time.

Every business owner's nightmare

Business owners stress about money and there is one thing that we all fear. Something that happens every year and is every business owner's nightmare. This horrible catastrophe is called…

Business slowdown!

It's ok, don't be scared and come back here for a minute. Those slower times happen to any businesses and can actually be a blessing in disguise (yeah we know, it is hard to believe. It took us 3 years to realize that!).

Time to take some me-time.

Remember how often you complain about not having enough time to take care of yourself as a person? Well those slowdowns are opportunities for you to relax and enjoy life: go visit a new city, finish those books that are waiting for you on your bedside table, spend quality time with your loved ones…

If you know this slowdown happens every year at the same period, then get the rest you finally deserve instead of stressing out about it. You know it is not gonna last anyway!

Time for new projects.

If you feel like you get enough rest during the year and feel guilty of working less: first, well you should not feel guilty! Second, this is the perfect time to get your creativity going by thinking of new projects you can add to your business.

Grab a pen and a notebook; and start writing down all the ideas that come to mind… You now have the time to make them come to life!

Are slowdowns happening too often?

If you feel those slowdowns are happening too often or come out of nowhere, then maybe there is something wrong. No need to panic, it doesn't mean you are getting out of business. First, you need to understand why this is happening, look around and dig deeper to understand clearly where it comes from:

• Maybe you have been a bit lazy with your marketing strategy.

• Maybe there is a new competitor in town.

• World events can also affect negatively businesses.

Second, is all about finding solution to make it better. Complaining will not make it magically go away, you have to act on it.

Put yourself out there.

Staying passive, away from everybody will not help to make your business more fruitful. You have to show the world how confident and proud you are about your biz-baby:

• Go to events and Meetups.

• Talk to people, be open to create new collaborations.

• Register to seminars to improve your knowledge and see how others are running their businesses.

Part time jobs can be a life saver!

If money is getting very short for you because your business is going down, you can always find a seasonal/part time job to help you bounce back and THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT. We know what you guys are thinking:

Going back to work for someone else, pfff never!

Entrepreneurs are proud creatures who don't like to ask for help and admit when there is something wrong. This is understandable, we put so much effort and sweat to keep our businesses alive that we love to think we did it all by ourselves.

Sometimes we have to put our ego on the side and make the right choice for the sake of our business.

📣 New Event!

Come join us on March 22nd in the Junction, for an inclusive event for women who are ready to find freedom, fulfillment, and are looking for a place to start. Coffee and croissants are on the house 🥐☕

More info here!

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Take control of your self-image

Originally written for The Beach Psychotherapy in Toronto

We never see ourselves the way we really are. And that could be okay if we didn’t have a tendency to turn towards negative feelings about our own image. Let’s be real, rare are the people who don’t fall into self-criticism.

Three years ago when we started Scandaleuse Photography, we didn’t know how much we would help women struggling with their self-perception. Women that can’t stand looking in the mirror and end up avoiding them at all costs. Women who think they are never good enough or who got their self-respect stolen from them. Women who feel stuck, who lack the amazing feeling of accomplishment that gives you butterflies and the motivation to keep growing and improving.

Because the relationship you have with yourself starts on the physical aspect and can impact everything else in your life.

Your femininity is a source of positive energy you need to tap into.

First things first: you are not alone. At least 1 out 5 Canadian women are not happy with the way they look. That is huge. There is a certain pressure society lays out for us that implies, or rather screams at us, that the definition of beauty is to be thin and flawless. Seeing this very day, It is very difficult not to compare yourself to these standards and feel miserable if you think you don’t match them.

You are your best ally and your worst enemy. Getting in touch with yourself is essential for a positive mind growth and it starts with celebrating your own kind of beauty and femininity, your way.

That’s right, your version of being feminine. Because there isn’t just one perfect way, you can twist it and morph it making it your own.

Let us tell you a little story. When we photographed Lea, she told us she refused to see herself as attractive. She could see it through her partners’ eyes, but couldn’t believe it from her own perspective. Through her session, she finally managed to see that she was beautiful with every aspect of her body. Things she had considered “flaws” such as, “her asymmetrical breasts, soft belly, cellulite and hair”

Sometimes you need to see yourself from another pair of eyes to ditch the distorted image you have of yourself.

If you have one day in which you feel even a tiny bit good about yourself, channel it 500% and use it as a constant strength. Because while we all have moments when we feel not so good about ourselves, we also have days when, hey, we’re actually okay. It could be as simple as having a good hair day or a little success like changed that light bulb that had been burnt out for months. Take this feeling, hold it tight and nurture the hell out of it.

Take Katie as an example, a lovely woman with a physical disability. She decided to not let this get it the way and to celebrate her true self. It started slowly, one step at a time with a better diet and focusing on improving her range of motion. She put herself on a good path, wanting to make of her goals come true: showing it to the world. That’s when she called us. She said it herself “I am ready to challenge what people expect. You are not invisible, you are worthy.”

What about when someone stole and damaged your self-love?

This is Erica’s story. Erica suffered from the hatred of a man, a family member for years. While she managed to escape, it wasn’t without consequences: this experience completely destroyed her self-esteem. She told us she didn’t have control of her own image anymore. We met completely randomly and she gathered the courage to challenge herself with a boudoir session.

It wasn’t easy. We saw her shake, hesitate and even tear up but she did it. Posing in front of the lens made her realize that the qualities she was admiring in others were also part of her.

She was able to win back what she thought was gone forever and shout out to the whole world “I will never feel ashamed to be me anymore.”

This feeling of accomplishment is a great push to keep going, you end up craving it and you’ll do anything to keep creating and experiencing it.

The truth is: once you get the courage to show yourself and vulnerable in lingerie in front of “strangers”, you’re left with an empowering feeling of “I can do anything”.  Everyone needs to challenge themselves on different levels. It makes you want to keep going, it helps you grow and become more assertive, thus more confident. You end up creating a cycle of positive vibes which will lead you to move mountains.

Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend, because after all, YOU are your best friend. If there is one thing you need to take away from this post is that you only have one body and one mind; it’s YOURS to make use out of it.

If you feel like spending time with us on a Sunday morning with pastries & coffee, join us on March 22nd for our new workshop “A guide to trusting yourself” ! Sign up below to get the deets!

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How facing your body image can help your personal growth

While the personal development and body-positivity movements are growing everywhere online, rare are the people truly at peace with their bodies. Hell, can we even be comfortable with how we look 100% of the time? We don't think so. But for some of us, it gets to a level of maximum ignorance. You dodge mirrors as much as possible, you don't "waste time" putting thoughts into your looks, after all, you have other mountains to conquer, you want to grow, and that happens in the mind right?

But what if we told you that no matter how much work you put into climbing those mountains, you will end up stuck at some point in your growth, your search of happiness, if you don't connect with your body?

If you want to feel completely fulfilled, you will have to also prioritize your connection with your body. No need to read a zillion miracle morning books and start random routines just yet if you can't face yourself to begin with. 

Do you recognize yourself in one or more of the following situations:

Avoiding your reflection

You're a master at avoiding to look at any type of reflection in your everyday life. Mirrors are just a practical thing for you to make sure you have nothing stuck in your teeth, but it doesn't go beyond. Frankly, it just makes you uncomfortable to look at yourself, so just like an ostrich, you would rather dig your head in the sand rather than having to deal with our own image.

You look, but it just makes you sad. 

Nothing is good enough with you. You're not this enough, or too much of that. Maybe you are even ashamed, or embarrassed about your physical appearance. You spend your time comparing yourself to others or even older versions of yourself.  

Worrying too much about your appearance is just superficial or even narcissistic.

Looks are not everything, you don't need to impress anyone after all. Overall, you think you are pretty neutral about your appearance. You do the bare minimum because you have to, but that's pretty much it. 

Let's be honest: if you are not facing your own image and simply looking at yourself, it's not because it's so much fun like a day in the park. You're avoiding it because it hurts to do so. 

So if any of these situations speak to you, it is time to change.

What happens if you don't connect with your body:

Can you grow? Yes. You can start setting yourself up for whatever you wish you to become or do. But here is the catch: you can only grow to a certain extent and you will get stuck at some point. 

To break it down easily, if you are not literally facing yourself because any situation stated above and if you are not taking the time to make peace with your body, you are telling yourself that on some level, that you are just not good enough or not worth it. This often happens completely unconsciously, which makes it even more sneakier. And what happens when we think we are not good enough? We deny ourselves opportunities because we don't believe we will be up for them anyway. 

In conclusion, by not connecting with your body, you are setting limiting beliefs for yourself. Again, that can be completely unconscious. 

Time to get real (you can do this!)

Let's rip off the band-aid right here: you can't avoid yourself forever. You only have one body carrying you through life and you are responsible for it. If you tend to be negative about it, it will make you pay one way or another. Plenty of studies have shown that negativity directed towards yourself and your body can lead to health risks in the long term. Better start giving yourself some lovin'! 

When you look good, you feel good.

While some of us think it is superficial to focus on your looks, we think there is a lot of untapped power by not doing so. Wearing your favourite clothes, getting dolled up, taking care of your skin, moving your body… all of these create a powerful feeling of being unstoppable. Why not tap into that as much as we can? Don't forget, this is about YOU, not others. All of the decisions regarding your preferred options about your appearance belong only to you.

You don't have to impress anyone. 

That is true, but you should try impress yourself. Taking care of your relation with your body and taking actions for it should not be about other people. It should be for your own sake, to your own standards. And even more so, you should create your own validation and not depend on others. I had a very poor sense of self-worth until the first time I fell in love. My boyfriend back in the day saw what I couldn't see: that I am a freaking beautiful person. I was over the moon until the relationship ended. All of that self-worth built through this left with him and I had to start again from square one. It took me a heartbreak to start building my self-worth by myself, for myself. Validation from others is a temporary good feeling, it doesn't stick. At the end of the day, you are the person you spend the most time with.

You are not alone

• Raise your hand if you have ever looked at old pictures of yourself and thought "wow, I thought I was so much fatter/thinner back then that I actually was!". 

• Keep your hand up if you have ever heard coming from others that you are not seeing yourself the way you really are.

• Don't get a cramp, but hold that hand high if you have ever beaten yourself up over flaws you think you have, beyond rationality.

Well, welcome to the club of body-dysmorphia: being incapable of visually seeing your body the way it actually is. For some of us, it can become obsessive and very challenging in life. We strongly suggest to read this article if you think you may suffer from body-dysmorphia. 

Learning to embrace who you fully are is the best gift you can ever give to yourself. 

This is how you develop your own trust and how you stand up for yourself. You owe it to yourself to create the path towards who you want to become.

Take some time to reflect, be grateful for this body of yours, supporting you everyday. Nourish and strengthen it the way it needs. You will see that it will remove SO many blocks you didn't even know you had, and make more room for all of these beautiful ideas hidden in the back. And if you need a little bit of help, we are here for you…

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Luck should not be an excuse

A lot of people around us seem to be amazed by the life and experiences we living. Our Scandaleuse's community, travels, photoshoots and projects we had (and keep having) seem to be impressive and people truly enjoy it. We have never received so many compliments and love from friends, family, clients and strangers since we have left France. “You guys are lucky” they say…

Luck has nothing to do with it

When we were living in London, during a cold winter evening, we were talking to a friend from photography school online. He was asking questions about our life in London and was telling us his dream was to go to Australia but felt a bit lost and scared about this idea. We remember him telling us: “you guys are so lucky for leaving Paris, I wish I could do the same but you know my english is pretty bad and living in another country is expensive”. So we told him we weren’t lucky, we just kicked our own butts and took the decision to leave. Don't imagine everything was perfect, when we arrived in London our English was pretty bad, we didn’t have a job and only a few savings.

We could have found every excuses to not go to England because yes it was scary. Instead we decided not to listen to our negative thoughts and booked our ride. And you know what? It was the best decision ever! In 8 years we have achieved a lot in our lives (both professionally and personally) and we have met a lot of wonderful people from all over the world, who helped us make our dreams come true.

But this has nothing to do with luck! We work hard, we take risks, we get out of our comfort zone, we stress, we cry but most of the time we have fun. You know why?

Because we just love what we do and this is the best motivation you can get!

Stop stopping yourself

We all have excuses and fears, obstacles we put in front of ourselves but there is something easy to understand:

if you want, you can.

Don't get us wrong, we are not saying all dreams are easy to realize (most of them require knowledge, money, strength, time and surrounding yourself with the right people), neither we are all born with a silver spoon in our mouth. But even if we don't all have the same financial situation or life benefits, living the life you dream of IS POSSIBLE when you have ideas, projects and a strong will to change.

There is a famous quote from Tony Gaskins that has helped us understanding the power of “I Can” and positively impacted the decision to open our business:

"if you don’t build your dream, someone will hire you to build theirs."

The "GYST": Get Your Stuff Done

The first step is the most difficult to take but once you start working on your project, it will get easier, especially if you got a proper organization:

• Find your goal

• Plan step by step how to make it successful.

• Make the steps to do so accessible and specific. It will sounds unreachable otherwise.

• Invest or find investors to help you financially

• Educate yourself on the knowledge you are missing to achieve your goal. (PS: Libraries in Toronto are free. Just saying.)

• Or build a team of people who know how to do what you don't

• Spend time on your project. Kiss the procrastination goodbye.

• And most important: DON'T GIVE UP!

There are wonderful tools (such as internet and libraries that are full of information) available to help you take the first step towards realizing your projects. And if you don’t know or if you can’t do, don't hesitate to ask people around you for help; you will be surprised to see you are not alone. People will be happy to help you!

Remember, you are the only one who can move things up for your own happiness and future. Don't you want to become the person you desire to be?

Now roll-up your sleeves and go build your mini-empire!

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How & When To Change Your Life

We all want to be Happy. To not have any regrets. To feel at peace with ourselves, feel accomplished and fulfilled. It sounds so simple, doesn't it?  So why do we struggle to actually reach it? 

Here is a little test for you, answer honestly and from the heart!

Have you ever compared yourself to others, or wish for what you don't have?

Have you ever felt like you were too old to change, or that you've invested yourself in a lifestyle or career that doesn't feel right for you but the thought of quitting it sounds unrealistic because you have been at it for so long?

Have you ever felt like you were just being a spoiled brat because you match the pretty checkboxes of what success is supposed to be on paper, so you really shouldn't complain?

If any of these resonates with you, it is time for you to read the following:

We have this lame habit of creating obstacles on our own paths. Sometimes unconsciously because we are conditioned to. Sometimes out of fear and doubts. But here is the truth:

We already have all the tools we need to create our own happiness. You, us. Everyone. And it is just a matter of choosing them and learning how to use them.

Now read that again. 

Your age doesn't matter. The time invested in your current path doesn't matter either.

We have met women in their 50's who have drastically changed their lives. We have had clients who opened their dream businesses because they decided to silence their inner fear. We have a friend who is 75 and decided his age will not be a limit to his dreams. 

You know what they all say? "I should have done this sooner". 

The minute you stop ignoring this craving for change you have deep down in your heart in order to be happier, magic happens. 

To make it work, you're gonna have to learn to listen, face your limiting beliefs and put yourself first.

What if the first step is to stop doubting yourself?

We all set expectations for ourselves on how we should be and act on a mental but also physical level. Again, due to conditioning or standards we are facing on a daily basis.

You must have this vision on how you think people see you, and maybe you even create a certain pressure around it. And if you feel like you are not matching those expectations, you end up doubting your behaviour and choices, focus on your flaws and disregard your qualities. In conclusion: you're hitting the brakes on following your life aspirations until you "fix this".

But have you ever noticed that people seem to see you differently than you see yourself? We sure have! And it totally makes sense!

It is impossible to see ourselves from an outside perspective. To see how we talk and interact with others or how we use our body language… For example, some people can see you determined, others can see you aggressive. Maybe you look bored, or maybe you just feel particularly calm.

It can be so confusing that we end up wishing to be different and our inner voice wakes up, full of:

"I wish I were smarter!",

"I wish I could be like this person!",

"I wish my life were different!".

However, nothing is set in stone.

You are not a constant package with the same features forever and you cannot please everyone. So how about doing what feels right for YOU?

You are your most powerful asset. And you will definitely feel the happiest when you feel like your true-self and this requires making decisions despite what others might think. After all, regrets are our worst enemy, especially when we refuse to learn from them.

So how do you become the person you desire to be? How do you get in harmony with your mind but also your body? How do you gain that confidence to live the life you deserve? 

Allow yourself to ask for help

There is no magical recipe to improve yourself overnight but there are concrete ways to achieve it.

Changing is a long process that can be difficult and frustrating, especially if you do it by yourself. We believe humankind is stronger when we work together, so there is no shame to ask for help when you need it.  

With the proper expertise, tools, exercises and a strong willpower to work on yourself, you can make those changes happen faster than you think. But all of this cannot take place unless YOU ARE READY to welcome it!

You are Limitless

You are unique and we want to show you that you can do anything, that life is an ocean of opportunities and realize you do not have to follow only one path.

We want to help you tap into your potential to create your own future and follow your desires. 

This is why we created The Limitless Program. We are combining mindset consulting and boudoir photography to help you heal from the inside out by giving you the tools to elevate yourself and build the self-confidence you can apply to any area of your life.

It’s about making micro changes that result in macro differences, so you can finally become a stronger and more fulfilled version of yourself.

Through Limitless, you are saying YES to taking your life by the reins and steering yourself into the person you’ve always wanted to be.

Are you ready to live your life to the fullest?

Own your identity, armpit hair or not.

Get ready for this universal truth: we all have hair. Everywhere. And you've probably heard at least once in your life "you should remove it", "it's gross", "why do you care?" "all natural baby!" "Aren't French people hairy anyway?"(oh wait, that one is for us eheh). It's time to unleash the truth.

Hair, no hair; does it really matter?

A couple of months ago, Marion Seclin (a french influencer we are following on social media), was talking about the fact she did a photoshoot with a brand who edited her hair out on Photoshop, without notifying her. She said she took the decision 4 years ago to let her hair grow naturally and she was very angry about the studio’s behaviour:

The decisions concerning YOUR body belongs to YOU and you ONLY.

By photoshoping her hair out, without her CONSENT, that brand violated her right to be the individual SHE DESIRES TO BE. They disrespected her life's choices. And for what? Because they felt like she didn’t match their standards. Standards usually imposed by the media, fashion industries and beauty companies.

Nobody should tell you what is the best for you (either on a physical or mental level). Hair or no hair doesn't make one single difference. If people are telling you the opposite, you might not want to have them in your life.

Your body's decisions must be made based on your opinion. not others.

If you choose to wax every 3 weeks or not, it should be because it makes you feel great that way and not because you feel like you HAVE to do it.

Story time: We had a wonderful photo shoot with Léa Castor in Paris. She stopped removing her hair a couple of years ago, because she realized that she wasn't really doing it for her, but for her lover at the time. She said that she wanted to start loving her hair the way it actually is, but it was hard. Not because she thinks it looks ugly but because of society: she felt like people will judge and criticize her.

When we first talked about her session, we really wanted to showcase and do close-ups of her hair to tell the world "hey see, it's not bad at all!" but it turns out that we just focused on her as a person like we always do. And guess what?

No one actually noticed her hair and for the few photos where you could actually see it, it just looked great.

By not making the hair the main focus and sticking to our way of shooting (about the actual person and not her physique), we just made it normal.

We didn’t bring attention to it because we didn’t think it defined her fully anyway. And no one cared either.

Building your identity despite expectations: damn that's hard.

But damn, it is worth it. Being able to live your life the way you want to is the best feeling in the world.

You feel in harmony with your values, you can take on anything, it is pretty much the road to your long-term happiness. Jackpot.

However, from the minute you will start making decisions to be fully yourself, you are going to have to face… the Others.

They could be friends, family, anyone who feel like sharing their 2 cents about whatever it is you are doing for yourself and they are probably against what you are doing. And this makes the whole process for building your own identity very challenging.

This is when you have to stick to your guns. Why? Because any critics about your journey is actually not about you. It’s about whoever says them. They are simply projecting their own insecurities and fears on you.

People who don’t feel like they are giving it all in their own lives are going to try to bring down anyone who tries.

Read that again.

• You want to start weight-lifting and you are hearing “ugh you're gonna be so bulky, it’s not feminine”?
• You want to learn a new skill and you hear “oh, I know someone who tried and they failed, it was so hard, you’re not gonna make it.”
• You want to let your damn hair grow and they’re like “this is just gonna look gross, why do you do that to yourself?”

They are not thinking about YOU. By you trying something new and different, they just have no excuse not to and it makes them very uncomfortable. Because they have to face their own fears and limiting beliefs.

So don’t take it personally. Don’t let them bring you down. Keep being true to yourself. This is your life.

A little recap for the road:

• Living your life being fully yourself is possible for everyone.

• Decisions about your body are only yours to make.

• People who are criticizing your decisions are not talking about you but about themselves.

Are you ready to move forward and become the best version of yourself? We can help you. Join us on January 1st and become Limitless.

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Letter to my 17 year-old self

Dear 17-year-old Juliette,

You know, there is this trendy exercise I have seen around lately, in which you are writing to your 10 years younger self. People warn their younger selves, they tell them what they could have done and what they should have avoided, so they can have an easier present.

Are there stuff we should have done back then? Absolutely.

Maybe you can let go a bit more and stop worrying about other people's opinions and expectations.

Maybe you can speak louder and send those nasty guys packing when they harrass you in the street, making you feel so small and so uncomfortable.

Maybe you can learn to appreciate the way you look instead of comparing yourself and fighting so hard to hide what you think are flaws. Like this big chunk of side bangs you’re desperately trying to hide behind for some reason. Dad used to say “You have 2 eyes, why can't I see both of them?” and I know you scoff at it. Fact though: he's right.

Maybe you can start trusting people instead of taking over everything and everyone. Maybe you will be disappointed like you are convinced you will be, but maybe not.

But honestly, I am glad you didn't do any of these things. Because thanks to those, you went through experiences and learnt the lessons included in the package.

Because thanks to you, I can do all of the above now, confidently and I am spreading the good vibes around me.

So instead of those “maybes", I want to say thank you .

Thank you for being the stubborn woman you already are. I wouldn't have pursuing my dream career without it. (Seriously girlfriend, we've been photographers for over 12 years now! Can you believe it?!)

Thank you for being open-minded and curious. Without you, I wouldn't have learned english and been able to speak it every day almost flawlessly.

Thank you for not being scared to see big. Otherwise we would have stayed in France where we felt “meh” and settle for a boring life instead of changing country twice, open a successful business and then meet the love of our life. (he's really cool and also really handsome. Freaking jackpot, let me tell you.)

Thank you for trying to deal with that body of yours. Because at some point, I said f*ck it and decided to take the self-love route. If you hadn’t gone throught those troubles, we wouldn't have been able to help other people with the same struggles through our work!

At the end of the day, Juliette, I wouldn't be here if it wasn’t for you. Thank you for paving this road for me. I can't wait to see what 10-year older Juliette will have to say about the one I am paving now. I'm sure we will make her proud too.

---

I strongly encourage you guys to try this little exercise of introspection. We can’t tell you enough that self-love is your tool to nurture as much as you can, in order to be happy on the long-run. Feel free to tag us if you share yours in a post! Lots of love. J & F.

Don't get stuck in your routine

Let me tell you a little story Scandals…

This year I wanted to improve my sensuality and build up my energy level by adding more movement into my workout. So I decided to try something that makes me really uncomfortable: DANCING. I am not talking about going to a club with my friends or dancing in front of strangers (I am always happy to dance in a silly way in front of people). I am talking about signing up for dance classes, where you have to learn a choreography. I am one of those people who sucks at dancing: no coordination whatsoever in my steps and always starting with the wrong foot. It makes me feel so self-conscious and ridiculous, get easily frustrated and usually end up by giving up after the first class. But not this time. I am stepping out of my comfort zone even tho it does not feel good yet!

Now, you might be thinking: “Why someone would push her/himself to do something that makes them feel really uncomfortable?” Well, let's see…

What is a comfort zone and why is it difficult to get out of it?

It is simply a behavioral state in which things feel familiar to a person, where their activities, habits and actions fit a routine and pattern that minimize stress and risk. They are at ease and in control of their environment. It provides them a state of mental security they benefit in certain ways: regular happiness, low anxiety, and reduced stress.

Because of bad experiences from our past or external influences (such as medias or loved ones), our mind is conditioned to be afraid of the unknown. The fear that is created from our lack of experience in certain field of life acts as a stop sign, a wall we put between us and our goals. We put ourselves in a protective mode and even tho our comfort zone feels like a little heaven for a short period of time, it can become a trap on the long run.

Why is it important to check your routine off?

Not a lot of people like to take risks or be uncomfortable. Instead we have the tendency to stay in our warm and safe bubble, away from all of the possibilities the world has to offer. We get stuck in a routine without realizing it is slowing us down from improving ourselves and moving forward in life.

Of course, we are not telling you to completely change your life or to take stupid risks. But it is important, from time to time, to get out of your comfort zone and experience life in a different way. It will creates enough positive stress to increase your curiosity and drive, will help you to respond positively to stress when unexpected events happen.

How to get out your comfort zone?

• SWITCH UP YOUR ROUTINE.

There is no reason to put too much pressure on yourself and take the risk to feel overwhelmed. Start with simple steps like: trying a new coffee shop, walking a new road to work, waking up earlier everyday… Those simple actions are the best way to slowly help you and motivate you to put one foot out of your comfort zone.

• GIVE UP CONTROL.

Let go of your insecurities by learning to trust people around you. Agree to things you wouldn’t normally consider and open your mind: we think we know better but it is just a question of perspectives.

• TRY SOMETHING NEW UNTIL YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE.

Start conversations with strangers, give compliments, learn a new skill… Most of the thing that makes us feel uncomfortable are usually the ones we are not really good at it, so whatever you choose, do not give up. Practice makes it perfect!

• MOVE TOWARD YOUR FEARS.

That is the toughest but most efficient one because it pushes you to work deeper on yourself. The feeling of fear is vital in some circumstances for our survival but it can also be irrational. When you feel afraid of something, it is usually a sign you have to fight it in order to expand your life and not miss any opportunity. Start by understanding the root of your fear than you will be able to confront it.

What do you do to get out of your comfort zone?

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PROFESSIONAL LIFE 101 | 6 tips to create an amazing collaboration

Have you ever tried to organize a party, a dinner and people rsvp'd last minute or even not at all ? You pour your heart and soul into the planning but can’t organize it because you don’t know how many people are coming? This is just one of the many examples of massive frustration. But we have a solution for you.

First of all I want to thanks those fantastic people who have worked with us and helped to achieve amazing partnerships. Thank you guys for your hard work and professionalism, You ROCK.

Sadly, this professionalism is actually quite hard to find. And it stops you from A: creating that awesome project you have in mind and B: having a solid team of people to do it.

Let's review the most common issues:

• People disappear from the face of the Earth (while updating their instagram feed)

• People reschedule all the time. (while sharing that awesome cat video on facebook)

• People cancel last minute. Like when you're already there. (With a snap like "HANGING OUT WITH BAE LOL")

Conclusion: everything ends up sucking. Hard core.

I feel like some people don’t understand the challenge behind a “simple collaboration”. They don’t take it seriously or maybe they don’t even care and don't get me started on the unpaid side of things we deal with sometimes.

Whether you are one of these people or not, we have put together a list of advice you can apply to your daily life, here, take it, it's free and you will make friends.

HERE ARE 6 TIPS TO CREATE AWESOME COLLABORATIONS :

• it all started with... a great communication

Let's face it, being honest all day everyday is not in the human nature and can even be hurtful if you don’t use the good words. 

Don't worry though, for professional collaborations, it is actually not that hard. If you want your project to work, you need to know not only your expectations but also your team's. Honesty and communication from the very beginning will build the game plan. And if you have a solid game plan, you are very likely to get outstanding results.

Pro tip: Since we don’t know intimately the people we are gonna work with, it gives us a chance to stay objective and put our ego aside, yay!

• Don’t be afraid to say “NO” if you can’t do a project.

Apparently in this case, your team members gets a higher chance to get abducted by aliens before (or even in the middle sometimes) of the project you're working on. Joke aside, it's okay to be busy. If you already know you can't make it, just say no. Promise no one will hate you, we might actually respect you more and thus we will still share cookies with you.

When we work on a collaboration.

• AN EXCELLENT ORGANIZATION is a must

If communication is the pillar in a project, organization is the white picket fence around it. The two basic skills are the following:

 1) Plan your trip in advance: Check how long it takes to go to the location, find if there are constructions on subway lines or roads, leave earlier than what GOOGLE or the GPS says. If you drive, be careful with rush hour time.

2) Come ready: Write a list (I have never been a big fan of lists but I found them very helpful, especially when I have a lot on my mind) and make sure you have everything you need before leaving.

• BE PROFESSIONAL (DUH). Even when no money is involved.

I care a lot about this point. I was telling you earlier that it’s hard to find people acting professionnal for unpaid projects. As photographers, we have worked for free a lot and we still do sometimes.  People have the feeling that if they don’t make money for their services when they do a project, there is no need to put effort on it. Wrong !!! If you chose to get on board for a collab for whatever reason, honor it. "Not Paid" doesn’t mean "Not Serious".

• BE INVOLVED. It's more fun and we ain't your mama.

Just because you didn’t start this collaboration doesn't mean you can’t be fully into it. Bring your ideas with you, new suggestions are always welcome.

Another good way to have fun in a project which is not yours, is to take initiatives. Talk to people, create contacts, ask if you can help with anything. When it’s your turn, don’t hesitate to give direction, you know what you have to do, you know your craft.

• LAST MINUTE CANCELLATION will result in a bloody nose.

Ahhh the famous last minute cancellation, a tricky subject! Life is full of surprises and sometimes, we have to deal with a change of plans. If for whatever reason you can'tmake it anymore (and it is actually a legit reason, not a "I didn't wake up this morning y'all"), don't forget other people are counting on you (looking straight at that hairstylist that didn't show up for our latest styled shoot.)

Here is what to do: either contact the project planner to advise him/her on your cancellation as soon as you know. It helps to deal with the damage control that follows.

Second, if unfortunately you have no other alternative than not showing up the day of the project, be a grown-up and find someone to replace you.

Now, you should be ready to fly from the nest, keep your pretty nose, and make new friends to create some new awesome projects. You're welcome.

are YOU coming to The Scandaleuse Soirée?

We are launching our first soirée ever on November 13th for a new service we are launching. Come party with us!

Our new concept

Since day 1, we have always said that Scandaleuse was not about just beautiful photographs. A lot of you have experienced it since we first opened in 2015. We are now taking one more step to bring it out even more.

Scandaleuse is growing and changing, and we couldn't be happier.

Join us on November 13th to celebrate and find out what we have been working on for all these months…