Editing VS showing reality

Wandering on the internet, we came accross a fellow boudoir photographer asking for feedback regarding to one of her client’s session. Then, we saw something in the comment section that left a bit surprised:

We've written about our editing process about how, while we can remove anything that’s temporary (like pimples), we have personally chosen not to change bodies, edit scars, birthmarks, and other little things that make you, you. But that's just us.

In fact, many women actually don't post anything online before (heavily) editing it.

Hold on while we get our nice and shiny red flag.

Holding on to an edited picture of yourself may feel good in the short-term, but you're not doing yourself a favor on the long-run.

Here is why:

1) Hiding the real you is not gonna help you appreciate who you are.

The more filters and editing you use, the more you get accustomed to seeing yourself with them. Except we don’t have them in real life.

They’re not on your mirror, they’re not here when you are having a rough day. People don't see you with them. After getting used to apply filters everywhere, you feel like you created a physically “better” version of yourself and this ends up clouding your vision.

a simple reflection in the mirror could absolutely shatter your self-esteem since your notion of reality around your appearance is not accurate anymore.

On top of that, chances are you’re gonna have a rough time, as you get older, to get used to the changes your body and face will have. Those are inevitable and with the habit of editing everything, you could fall into a rabbit hole of self-loathing.

2) You may use the “edited you” as a standard to compare yourself.

It is very common to refer to old photos of ourselves and compare them with what we look like now. Sometimes, it's already not a very nice thought process, if you think you were “better” then.

With time, the memories blend in together. If you apply some edits, even smooth, on every pictures of yourself, you may forget to what extend you did and look back at those wondering why you “don’t look as good as you did then'‘. Except you'd be referring to something that isn't real to begin with.

3) By heavily editing your images, you are adding to the problem you are a victim of.

It is not news that the media has been spreading images edited beyond anything real. But it is not only media anymore, since it has become so easy to do it ourselves.

If you are a fellow user of those intense editing apps, you are contributing to the myth that bodies and faces have to be perfect.

There begins the vicious cycle:

Let’s be honest, you are editing yourself to look like other edited women who look perfect despite not being real. Other women in your circles might compare themselves to you and tweak their images to look as “perfect” as you do. And it keeps going. So not only aren’t you doing yourself a favor, but you are not doing other's a favor either.

So, how to get out of this editing hell?

1) Protect yourself from perfect-looking content.

Unfollow the accounts that shows exclusiely perfect bodies, skins and so on. None of these are real. Skin has pores, rolls, cellulite, hair, blemishes, wrinkles… That's the reality and it is A-OKAY! Replace them with positive accounts, showing the real deal (like ours ehehe). You will then train your eyes again to see the beauty in reality, which will spread on your beautiful self.

The more you remove those fake images around you, the more you will bring your notion of reality back to a healthy level.

2) Show the real you.

It may sound harsh, but the only way to break this cycle is to show the real you. Ditch the filters. Remove the editing.

You have the power to help yourself and other women by simply showing reality.

Of course, you don't have to show yourself straight out of bed, first day of your period, with something on your teeth! Just keep it simple.

There is nothing to be ashamed about your real face and body. There is nothing wrong with you.

By showing the real deal, you are saying “stop” to this unnecessary pressure around appearance. You are giving yourself the chance to exist in your own way. And that leads to more room to focus on who you are and who you want to become. Be a part of this positive movement, for yourself, but also for others! We can't really do it without you.

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You deserve to love your body (again)

We all have body insecurities. Yes, even that person in the corner that you think is perfect, they very likely doesn't like something about their body. Those can become bigger and bigger everyday and can really impact your life on a daily basis. But it doesn’t have to be. If there is one person can hit the brakes on those, it is you.

In order to develop body-acceptance and give yourself a break, there are a few things to consider and myths to debunk:

No, You don’t have to “LOVE” your body all the time (and it’s really hard to anyway)

With movements like body-positivity being spread around and sometime, used as a marketing tool, it is very easy to believe that if you don’t love your body every single day, then you’re “failing” at it. To be honest, we believe that it is impossible to love your body constantly, because we, as human and especially as women, are not feeling the same constantly.

We work in cycles, are guided by hormones & emotions and Those fluctuate on the daily, as they should. So you’re gonna have good days, and not-so-good days, and it is absolutely normal.

Instead of beating yourself up, spiralling and thinking that you’re just an ugly duckling during the not-so-good days, aknowledge them, remind yourself they will pass, try to stick to a healthy routine and give yourself a break.

Your body changes all the time.

On top of having our moods changing from one day to the other, our bodies can change on an hourly basis. Take our tummies for example, usually a soft spot for many people: you can wake up with a fairly flat belly and boom, 2 hours later, it’s doing its things and you’re bloated. Your body is always working and we need to stop being hard on it for doing so.

Instead of focusing on just the way your body looks, focus on nourishing it and giving it what it needs. By just doing that, you will slowly start to appreciate it more and more, and your vision will change on the positive.

Enjoy those pleasantly surprised looks in the mirror you will experience soon enough! 😉

You don’t have imperfections, you have a map of memories.

When you really think about it, isn’t your body a keepsake of everything you have been in life?

Scars, stretch marks, and other various changes, they are here to witness what you have been through.

• Stretchmarks prove the ability your body has to adapt to a new you.

• Scars are here to remind you that you can heal. You’ve done it before, you will do it again.

• Wrinkles are a testimonial to how much you've laughed, cried, smiled. How much you’ve been LI-VING. This should be celebrated, not criticized and shamed.

Work on detaching from the media’s beauty standards.

One of the best ways to start appreciating your body is to listen to what YOU want to do and not what society says you SHOULD do. Wear whatever you want, change your hairstyle, get tattoos, get physically stronger, shave, not shave, put makeup on and so on. If you feel like walking around naked for the hell of it, then so be it.

Decisions about your body and appearance are yours and only yours to make. Re-read that, write it down, staple it somewhere!

You will be much happier the minute you start making decisions about yourself for yourself. So go, dye your hair blue, wear that dress you love, stop shaving your armpits if it makes YOU happy.

By the way, A boudoir shoot is a great way to say “screw it, my body is pretty awesome”. 😉

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Why your photos shouldn't be edited

In the photography industry, editing has always been a major part of the final images. We make the skin looking perfect, make sure everything symmetrical, we adjust bodies… Even to the niche that boudoir is, many photographers play by those rules. We personally don't. We don't believe people should be edited on photos and here is why…

Reason #1: because it’s not you.

One of the many reasons why you may be in front of a lens would be to get comfortable with your image. If said image is altered, what’s the point of even doing it? You may look back on those photos and say “I look great" but you will always have this after thought of “but that’s not really me". If anything, it may end up making you sad that you are not version.

Keeping your images editing and filters free will teach you to appreciate your appearance the way it really is.

And what does that lead to? Self-confidence, yay!

Reason #2: because those perfect bodies don't exist.

We say it, we read it: perfect bodies don't exist. But yet, some days, it is easy to forget, especially on social media with all of those accounts saying “look at me, I'm just like you, an everyday person!” but yet every single photo is perfect looking.

Real bodies come in all shapes in sizes. They come with rolls, with scars, cellulite, wrinkles & stretch marks.

We have been taught for way too long that all of these are flaws while they are just normal. It's about time they become the norm and are showed more often.

Reason #3: because the more we show reality on our end, the more the media will pick up on it and do the same.

We can say every negative thing about social media, there is one positive angle: they are what we make them. Meaning it is also in our power to turn them into something positive. Many companies (the smart ones!) have changed the approach regarding marketing to their customers thanks to what has been trending online such has body-positivity. Of course, that also came with sneaky companies pretending to be a certain way when they're not, but that has been happening since the beginning of time.

There is a true craving for authenticity for every single market, and it is a beautiful thing (most of the time).

So, what do we personally do as photographers?

Our editing policy is simple:

1) we pose you accordingly in flattering poses, for your body.

2) we remove anything that is temporary, such as blemishes, bruises, scratches and so on, with a very mild skin smoothing edit to remove any shininess. Anything that isn’t part of you every day.

We used to be a bit more “open” to editing, especially while doing certain poses that could make body parts bigger for example. But we have never executed this, because we never felt the need to and our models never asked anyway!

Seeing edited images constantly feed everyone's body insecurities. If it feeds yours, remind yourself that you have the power to change this outcome. Everytime you share a photo of you that's not touched up, you are inspiring someone else to feel comfortable the way they are. Pretty neat, right?

Looking to feel better in your own skin but not quite ready for boudoir? Sign up below to get our “what to expect for your boudoir shoot” PDF! ⬇️

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