Policing Black women’s hair has been a constant battle many of us have faced.

This post is a part of our series “If I Had Listened", in which we're reached out to strong-minded women we admire to tell us about a moment they chose to trust their gut and follow a different path despite other people's opinion.

If I had listened, I wouldn’t have cut my hair.

I have always played it safe.


As women, we have been conditioned to believe that long hair is a sign of our femininity. Especially as a Black woman, our hair is sacred. There are so many stories and beautiful memories we have of our individual hair journeys. Unfortunately, there are moments in our stories that aren’t pleasant.

Policing Black women’s hair has been a constant battle many of us have faced.

I remember feeling so excited to get my hair done but then secretly worrying about getting asked questions like “Is your hair real? Why do you change it so often? Can you wash it like normal hair?” Once someone told me, “you can't keep changing your hair like that. It makes you look unprofessional.”

For far too long, I listened. I played it safe. And because I was listening, I was holding myself back from being the sexiest, happiest, and most confident version of myself. 

I never cared much about Rihanna, but I loved how she rocked her hair. At one point she cut it short and I remember my eyes felt like they were falling out of my head because I SO wanted to do that. But I didn’t. Why? For starters, my mom didn’t think it was a good idea. Like I mentioned before, long hair is a sign of being a sensual woman and short hair to some means your edgy, reckless, wild, etc.

3 years later I moved out with my boyfriend. I posted a picture on Instagram of my hair pinned back and I got so many compliments. The one that stood out, encouraged me to make the biggest hair decision ever. “OMG! Did you cut your hair? It looks amazing!”


I remember that moment so clearly. I instantly started scrolling through Instagram for some hair inspiration and came across ‘The Cutlife’. I was freaking out!

I saw so many beautiful Black women with short hair. Fades, bobs, bald...these were my people! Without hesitation, I found the first stylist available and booked an appointment to cut my hair.

There was something so incredibly liberating about feeling my hair fall on my cape. I felt like a butterfly coming out of its cocoon.

Unfortunately, she totally botched it but when I did find the right stylist to fix it, I saw a woman in the mirror I fell so in love with.

My hair has become a signature component of my brand. I feel free, fun, confident, and powerful. To maintain its freshness, it must be cut every week!

If I had listened to what others had to say about women with short hair, I truly don’t believe I would be the version of myself I am today. If you’re reading this and have been debating to try a new look but question if it’s professional enough or to society’s standards, listen to me when I say FORGET WHAT THEY HAVE TO SAY! DO YOU! BE YOU! AND LOVE YOU!

You’ll thank yourself later.

Photoshoot in Costa Rica

It was about time that we wrote about this trip. Don't procrastinate kids.  Fanny and I had the opportunity to go to Costa Rica last February, to escape the canadian cold and follow an aerial silks retreat. Because, yes, we also do aerial silks!


This retreat is put together by the lovely Jamie Holmes, The Circus Fix genius and aerialist extraordinaire. If you are following us on our facebook and instagram, you are probably already familiar with her beautiful face! (and if you are NOT following us, it's not too late!)

While it was a pretty busy trip full of workouts and good food, we clearly saw that a shoot had to happen. We had it all laid out right in front of our eyes: gorgeous girl, outstanding country and a brand new business we were starting to nourish.

Now that we had 90% of the elements for a successful shoot, we needed one thing: the perfect spot.

We were located in a super small town called Santa Teresa, where if you don't have any sorts of transportation, you have to use your legs for 45 minutes in average (except the beach. That was across the street!). Been there, done that, Fanny and I started our little adventure for a solid 3 hours. As usual, we climb stuff, we crawl on the floor, and occasionally yell to one another "do you think this is safe???" And honestly, we didn't find what we were looking for. Until we walked home.


There it was, that super close by, easy to access, little path that no one noticed. Some sort of mini jungle, by a deserted beach. Across from the main street we are staying at.

We walked down that secret trail and fell in love. Everything was magical. The light was absolutely gorgeous at any time of the day. The greens of the jungle were mind blowing. After a thousand "wow" and "WOOOOOOW, we had it.

Side note: do not try to call monkeys there, they will throw coconuts at you. Fanny dodged one.

It felt like the photos were taken by themselves. Despite the heat, it was one of the easiest shoot we've ever done. Jamie did a fantastic job posing and we are so happy we got a chance to give her that. I only wish the shoot lasted even longer.

This is not only a "look-at-our-shoot" post. This is our first boudoir when Fanny and I worked together as a team.

This shoot triggered our love to shoot boudoir outdoors to create those out of the ordinary contrasts. This session showed us how well our ideas clicked together and how solid we are. It's thanks to this specific moment that we opened Scandaleuse a couple of weeks later.

To the next crazy shoot!

Show Us Your Tats - Mike

We were beyond excited to meet Mike. First, because he is officially our first participant for our brand new project Show Us Your Tats (SUYT) and then because we were so lucky to start this project with such an interesting piece. Indeed, Mike has his entire back covered, from neck to lower back.


Tell us a little bit about yourself:

My name is Mike, Right now I’m currently an International MBA student at the Schulich School of Business. I also sit on the board of a not-for-profit organization, and part-time I’m also a valet driver

Let's Talk Tattoos

Right now I have 2 tattoos (hoping to get more!). The first one I have is on my chest piece which is a Polish eagle, which represents my background and my family. It was a great first piece because the whole anxiety of future regret was removed, since regardless of what I become in the future, I will always be Polish by blood. This first one was done by Nathan Draper (at the time he was at Pearl Harbor Gift Shop in Kensington).


My second tattoo is a combination of things that I saw during my trips to Vietnam and Bali. The vietnam portion (the dragons) came to be when I was touring the Temple of Literature, and saw this very intricate design on the door. Instantly I knew it was something that I would want, since education is a large part of who I believe that we should all strive to be constantly learning. The second portion is a Balinese Garduda, which really connected with me when I was at the Garuda Wisnu Kencana in Bali. At first it was the design that really hit me, but then the more I looked into it the more the idea of “fiercly attacking” started to stick.

In the end, I decided to combine the two on my back, so it’s a personal reminder that I should always be striving to improve myself, and that anything I choose to do to that end I do so with undaunting ferocity (when the going gets tough - keep going!). Of course, I can’t forget the very wonderful and talented Jenn Liles who did this piece!


What was the time and budget allocated for each piece?

The Polish eagle took 2 sessions, total maybe 5-6 hours. Approximately $300-$400

The backpiece took 10 months to complete. I asked Jenn if she knew how much it ended up costing in the end; all she said was that she lost count. Truth be told, so did I, and I think it’s for the better (I’m sure the total cost would have paid for a good portion of my tuition now). No regrets whatsoever - it never felt like I was overpaying for anything.

Is there something you wish you had known before getting tattooed?

The pain experienced is different for everyone.

The deets

Polish Eagle by Nathan Draper, now at Taunton Tattoo Company & Sugoi Tattoo
Back Tattoo by Jenn Liles, now at Hidden Door Tattoo (Dufferin & Queen), Toronto, Ontario