This post was initially posted on She Does The City, through our collaboration with them and Womanizer. We have slightly altered the original version to add our touch to it.
We love sharing testimonial of women that are just like you and us and we hope you will enjoy Kosi's insight on self-love
“We’ve been programmed to feel like we’re under this great obligation as women to look and be a certain way. And that’s not our fault!”
Kosi is determined to shed the BS beauty myths that society has fed her over the years. She is now aiming to celebrate herself for who she is.
“I believe as women we judge ourselves WAY too much. I’d much rather women hear a real story than the fabricated perfection that we are fed on the daily.”
SDTC: It’s not easy to shut down the voices that dictate what we should look like. How have you managed this?
Kosi: From stretch marks to Endometriosis bloat and incision scars, it has been a long road for me, but I’m finally happy where I am. In my self-growth, I have had the opportunity to read many self discovery books, change my eating habits, start a new job which I love, and am in the midst of creating my first solo business venture. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy in my life and it came from what I like to call “pretty hurts.” I want to represent women who live with debilitating pain and—in spite of the pain—there is still great joy. I want to show how our beauty is from within, regardless of our physical and emotional scars.
How did the shoot make you feel?
The shoot made me feel like laughing. I’m a goofy girl at heart, so trying to pose my face was a challenge. I couldn’t help but giggle and dance and because of that, my favourite pictures are the ones with me smiling. I truly think the best thing anybody can wear is a good smile.
For those who lack confidence or are way too hard on themselves, what’s your advice for finding self-love? Gaining confidence?
Tell that little voice in your head trying to make you feel small to shut up. Seriously. Say it out loud, if you must. Create some affirmations, and put them up everywhere your eyes can see. Repeat them, and hold yourself accountable so that every time you speak negatively to yourself, you say something positive too. We are all divinely made and therefore we should love and appreciate ourselves just the way we are.
When it comes to sexuality, what’s something you’ve uncovered?
I don’t think there is just ONE person for you. I think there are several someones you are meant to meet, share time with and learn from.
What advice do you want to give your younger self?
Love yourself, honey… Truly get to know yourself and fall in love with yourself. Because that self-love is the bridge to every other relationship in your life to come.
Secondly, never stop dancing; on the street, while waiting in line for a coffee. That little shimmy is you. It’s your joy bubbling out of you and you should never be ashamed of it.