The mind is powerful. It is capable of making you believe you see things a certain way and turn it into a fact. That's why, sometimes, you can feel some sort of weight on your heart just thinking about something you don't like about yourself. Maybe it developed over time or maybe your "friend" Jessica made one comment out of spite when you were in grade 5 and it just stuck with you until your thirties.
All of these can make you see yourself and your body in a way that could be quite far from reality or could just affect the way you live your life. And in the end, it doesn't really matter how they got there. What matters is how you deal with them.
Here are 6 tips to help you say bye bye to your insecurities and start giving your body and mind some lovin'!
1) Understand that the vision of your body is rarely accurate.
Many many MANY outside factors can affect the way you see your body. Stress, hormones, change in your routine, or diet, lack of sleep… All of these and many more can give you a heavily distorted vision of your appearance. The best favour you can do yourself is to remind yourself of this when you have having a shitty body day.
Body-dysmorphia is also extremely common among us. Go check out our blog post about it if you want to learn more.
2) Avoid comparing yourself to others.
Comparing yourself to someone else is as easy as it is toxic, whether it is on a physical or a mental level. It's also very hard to stop once you get started.
So, if you catch yourself falling into this rabbit hole, remember that you do not know what is going on in someone's life, just like they don't know about yours, making it impossible to compare anything fairly. So what's the point of even going down that road? All it is going to do is create pressure, unachievable goals and potential jealousy. And you don't have time for this, you have great things to do!
Put down your phone, stop creeping on people you barely know & learn to become your own measurement system. Base your growth on what YOU and only you can do.
You are the only person you have to be proud of and it is much easier to do when you don't have the noise coming from the outside world.
3) If you can't give your body some love, focus on giving it appreciation.
All of this beautiful talk about loving your body the way it is sounds amazing, but some days, you just can't. And it is okay. It happens to everyone, nobody can love themselves all the time. But instead of talking trash about yourself, focus on bringing some appreciation for what you body does for you, aside from its appearance.
For example, I used to spend so much time deprecating my arms. I found them too big, not feminine. And sometimes I still do. Except that now, when I catch myself spiralling again, I remind myself of what my arms allow me to do. Maybe I have bigger arms that what is considered "aesthetically pleasing" for women, even though this is a BS society standard that has no legs to stand on. But thanks to my "big” arms, I can carry my weight in the air like a circus ninja and around a pole and I wouldn't change this for the world.
This recipe works for absolutely everything. Every negative side comes with a positive one. You have the option to decide how to look at it.
I don't know about you, but focusing on the down side is a complete waste of time, counter productive, and is definitely not the way to build your happiness.
4) Learn to accept compliments
Ha, that's something we definitely noticed, especially with women. It is considered SO not humble to accept a compliment that you HAVE to counter it with something negative to balance it out. Does that ring a bell?
What if you just said "thank you” and appreciated the compliment instead? Oh, it will feel weird at first, but only because you are conditioned to go against it. Like above, practice makes perfect and no, it doesn't make you a superficial b*tch.
Also, Some studies have shown that it takes 5 positive comments to remove the impact of 1 negative one. What if we just opened our damn ears to the good ones?
Chances are, if you are surrounded by caring people, they have shown their love and honesty towards you. They may have even tried to convince you that your insecurity was untrue. Why not believe them?
5) Stop covering up
This one is more related to physical appearance. Instead of avoiding your body insecurities, challenge yourself by facing them. Don't try to hide them, it won't help.
You have to figure out a way to highlight them, to bring a new light and perspective so you can make peace with them.
For example: stopping yourself from wearing an outfit you really like is not the way to deal, quite the opposite. Don't let these insecurities win!
It doesn't have to be big challenges, you can start small! A random example would be, if you'd like to decrease the amount of makeup you use, you can start by staying makeup free at home before taking it outside. Or even, lighten your makeup one day at a time…
It doesn't matter how big the step is, what matters is that you take it.
6) Explore your sensuality.
Learning to embrace your sensuality is a way to start feeling in harmony with your body to find peace and confidence. And if you are thinking you are as sensual as a kitchen pot then you definitely need to keep reading: we ALL have the potential to be sensual. Period. Which means you too, you just need a little more practice!
Your body needs to move and be acknowledged. Use that energy, that fire you have within you: dance, hug yourself, wear clothes that make you feel sexy, try new makeup or hairstyle…. Check out our blog post about sensuality for extra info!
Body love and appreciation is hard, just like creating any positive habits. But you are just as capable as your next door neighbour to do this. Is it a little finicky at first? Yes. Will you feel a bit silly to begin? Yes. But is it worth it? Damn right. You should be your own best-friend, after all, you are here for the long-run with yourself, right?!
Treat yourself with kindness, you are pretty awesome.