Hey Scandals, Fanny writing today!
I want to share with you my experience on turning 30. I feel like there are a lot of expectations coming from others but also from our own beliefs about starting a new decade. Generally speaking we believe that by 30 we should have our life together: be a home owner, married with kids and a carrier. So we put a lot of pressure on our shoulders thinking with HAVE to fit in this mold.
My friends, this is not the reality anymore (was it ever?) ! So let's dust off all of those expectations that, frankly, are just here to create more stress and anxiety. We don't want that in our life, do we?
Last January I turned 30 and honestly I was fine (end of the article, thanks for reading).
More seriously! I am the type of person who is not afraid to get old and die, so age was never really a struggle for me. But apparently it is a harder topic for others…
You see, people expect you to feel bad about turning 30, especially if you are:
a woman;
who is single;
with no kids.
Like me! So around my birthday, I have heard them all:
“You must be so sad to turn 30?”
“Still no kids hein!”
“Are you single by choice?"
“When are we seeing a ring on your finger?”
“You are not 25 anymore, time to get settled!”… Blablabla.
For those who know me, you will not be surprised to hear that instead of feeling angry, I tried to educate those people but man it asks for a lot of patience!
It is really easy for people to guilt trip others, especially if they believe they know better. It is usually done in a “I am joking” way but the result is the same: we feel bad about our life choices and start doubting ourself.
The way I see it is we have 3 options here:
we give up and make choices towards a life than is not ideal for us;
we feel angry at them, carrying negativity and frustration around. The chances are we are gonna explode at some point and start useless confrontations.
or, we ignore them and keep focusing on how we want to live our life (I vote for this one!)
Personally I believe some people are not worth my energy. I am happy with my lifestyle and would not trade it with anybody else. It makes me feel free and I know I am going towards the right path, meaning the one towards what I want to achieve.
Don't be afraid to dig into what you truly want and take actions to make them happen.
If your loved ones don't understand and disagree, then this is not your problem. In the end, it does not really matter what they think, they are not you. The best fight you can start is towards the life you wanna build for yourself.